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2020 > 01

Ring out, wild bells, Ring out the old, ring in the new...

A new year feels good, I think. Like an unwritten paper where everything in life is given another chance. A place where you can leave the old behind, take a new hold and move on and meet new people, experiences and challenges.

The year 2019 ended with an ambulance trip for me. At midnight between Sunday and Monday I had to go to the bathroom but as I got up from the bed a pain cut through my knee threwing me back into the bed. Then it was impossible to straighten the leg and even less try to stand on it. In the small hours, with great help from my husband, I was able to pull myself over to my work chair on wheels and be pushed to the bathroom and then slide down on the toilet seat and relieve the pressure. And then the same cumbersome procedure back to bed.
In the morning we called the medical advice and after a few different calls, the ambulance finally showed up here on the courtyard. When I finally managed to crawl up on the stretcher, they received a message over the radio about a cardiac arrest. They were closest, as quick as I could, I rolled down on the bed again and they made their way. A while later another ambulance arrived and I got a ride. It is usually a nightmare for most people to have to go by ambulance, something really serious has usually happened. But I had no major pain when I was just lying there so it was a fun experience and I met fantastic healthcare professionals everywhere.

The paramedic asked if I had been in an ambulance before and then I told him about my visit to the castle about 30 years ago. I had an audience with our Queen Silvia. An unforgettable meeting! We discovered, as we came out to the courtyard afterwards, that it had rained. I only took a few steps towards my car when I slipped and fell. The fact that I happen to fall I experience a little now and then and usually it goes well, but this time everything spun in my head as I tried to get up. The ambulance came and took me very fast to the hospital. Even though my foot hurt a lot, my leg prosthesis had slided halfwat off in the fall and twisted my little foot, it was an awesome experience to ride an ambulance through Stockholm. I asked if I could sit up and look ahead because they drove fast and it was so cool to see when all the cars in front of us left room for us on the narrow streets. The doctor found cracks in three places so not much to do more than endure the pain and allow time for it it to heal. The next day I jumped on my right healthy leg and with the help of a taxi I want to the aid center where I could borrow a wheelchair. When I got home twenty yellow tulips with a get well greeting from the Queen was hanging on my door. It's not every day you get flowers from the Queen herself! It felt like it was worth everything.

30 years ago it was the left leg but now it was the right leg instead. A smooth X-raywas made but they saw nothing. The amazing doctor I met pulled some joint fluid from my knee (not nice) to see that it was clear and then right before she pulled out the giant needle, she gave me anesthesia and then I had to wait a while. Then I started to stretch my leg and finally I could straighten it out. Hallelujah! When the doctor came back she was surprised but also happy and stated that I didn't have to end the year with a surgery. That feels good.

An experience of this kind makes me think and reflect. It would have been easy to find it unfair and I could easily have chosen to complain and feel sorry for myself. But why? Then it becomes even more difficult. This is not life threatening or constant pain. On the contrary, it made me slow down and lie on the couch and enjoy a time off. And I have a wonderful husband who looks after me and great personal assistants, a wonderful family and friends who write and call and care.

Before New Year a local newspaper wanted me to answer the question of what I want of 2020. I wish gratitude, contentment and humanity will permeate everything I do in the next decade! I replied.

Now I am going to get started with exercise and weight loss and listen to my body's needs. Slow down my tempo and enjoy more. To be followed... Happy New Year!

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